Mein Bruder

December 18th, 2006
Family, Loss

My mom called me this evening to tell me that my brother has disappeared.

On Thursday he got a call from his lawyer telling him that his appeal was denied, so he has to serve his full prison sentence (40 years, of which he’s served four) starting now. On Friday he ran.
How long has it been–seven years, maybe? Eight? A while back, he was in a car accident. Two people–an older married couple–died. My brother, a chronic drug user, was convicted under a brand-new Nevada law that carried mandatory jail time for DUI. A lot of it. And it wasn’t necessary to prove that he was under the influence at the time of the accident–certain blood chemistry levels were all that was needed for the conviction. (He tested positive for marijuana use.)

People have asked me how I feel about strict DUI laws. Yes, I’m all for them, in theory. If my parents had been killed in that car accident, I’d be livid if the other driver, a proven drug user, was let off with a slap on the wrist. But I don’t like the way this particular law was designed. And no, I’m not happy about what happened to my brother. I don’t think he deserves to be in jail for the rest of his life. I don’t think it’s clear that his drug use caused the deaths. And as he has pointed out repeatedly, convicted rapists got out of jail after serving far less time. I think rotting in jail for 4 or 5 years, and being denied the opportunity to ever drive a car again, is enough. I don’t think society is better off with him locked away.

This whole incident is part of a long and convoluted history that I won’t detail here. The bottom line is that my brother was finally beginning to improve himself and his life. He’s been clean and sober (according to the random tests he’s been required to take) and working hard these last eighteen months. I don’t see what good will come of locking him up again. He’s 37 now; if he started serving his remaining time right away, he’d be 73 at the end.

He’s made many stupid choices in the past, and I don’t want to excuse him from reasonable consequences. But it pains me to know how desperate he must feel right now. It makes me feel sick. I feel especially ill on my mother’s behalf. She doesn’t know when or if she’ll ever hear from him again. I’m furious, of course, that my brother is putting her through this. Not to mention the fact that as soon as a warrant is issued for his arrest (which may be as soon as tomorrow), my mother loses the 20K she posted for bail.

But I’m worried that if his escape plan (which he’s surely been concocting over time) doesn’t pan out, he might take his own life.

Mein bruder.

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